Why Does Love Feel Magical? Science Reveals an Evolutionary Advantage

Many individuals consider supernatural forces to be illusions based on wishful thinking in today's scientific society. The profound exception to humanity's general tendency toward reason, nevertheless, is still love.

People are accustomed to seeing romantic love portrayed on reality television programs like "The Bachelor" as a force cosmically connected to one's fate. It's a concept that is both absurd and eerily familiar to everyone who has ever fallen in love and believed their relationship was inescapably "meant to be." According to our research, people hold these enchanted beliefs about fated love and individual soul mates in very high regard.

We raise a fundamental question as psychology researchers who are interested in understanding why people think, feel, and act the way they do: Why does love seem so magical? We are hoping that the answer to this question may help to clarify some of the problems that people in love have long faced. Should you blindly believe that following your heart would make you happy, despite the chaos that comes with love just as much as ecstasy does? Should you strive for reason in your quest for a satisfying relationship, or should you instead view the predisposition toward magical thinking about love with skepticism?

Romantic love has the power to consume a person and appears to be a human universal across cultures and time.

Romantic love has been in human nature for many thousands of years; it is not a recent invention of poets or reality television producers. In actuality, modern love letters and those written in Mesopotamia 4,000 years ago are quite similar. Although myths and expectations about romantic love vary between cultures, the phenomena seems to be almost universal. Additionally, our research indicates that magical ideas of destined love and soulmates are widespread and strongly held.

But why does the human mind naturally include love? This issue is investigated in our research using an evolutionary psychological perspective.

According to evolutionary psychology, humans think and behave the way they do today because, over thousands of years, ancestors who possessed those traits were more likely to survive and procreate, passing those beneficial or "adaptive" traits on to the following generation. Through this process, the human mind developed to give priority to things that helped with survival and reproduction, like very nourishing foods and possible partners who would be good parents.

In light of this, how could the heady sensation of falling in love and the absurd conviction that a relationship is "meant to be" have aided in our ancestors' ability to survive or procreate? One argument holds that the lease agreement for the residence contains the secret to love's original purpose.

Love is similar to signing a lease.

Why do people sign lengthy lease agreements for apartments? After all, both the landlord and the tenant might discover a nicer flat in the near future.

The straightforward response is that both parties would be better served by committing to a long-term agreement with an imperfect but adequate lease because looking for the ideal apartment or renter is such a hassle and expensive process. The vital link that prevents the allure of alternative options from spoiling their advantageous arrangement is provided by the inked leasing agreement.

People struggle with a roughly identical commitment issue when picking relationships. Humans probably evolved to prefer monogamous unions that continue at least long enough to share parental responsibilities. Given the size of this commitment, there is strong incentive to do it correctly by selecting the ideal spouse.

Finding the perfect spouse, though, is difficult and resource-intensive. Therefore, dating is terrible. It is often preferable to commit to a decent enough spouse rather than an infinite pursuit of perfection in order to overcome the commitment problem and successfully pass on your genes. Therefore, love might have been a biological leasing agreement that evolved to solve the commitment issue while also offering a "intoxicating reward" for the answer.

Love is nevertheless a huge aspect of life for gay, asexual, and other persons who do not sexually reproduce, even though it may have originated primarily to assist sexual reproduction. Romantic connections can still offer adaptive benefits even if they don't result in sexual reproduction, according to researchers who have examined the development of same-sex desire. There is no single "normal" or "perfect" way to exist from a strictly evolutionary standpoint; diversity is the life force behind evolution, which is important to note.

First off, it paints other prospective partners in a really unimpressive light. People who are happy in their relationships perceive other attractive people as less attractive than those who are single. This perception change makes one's spouse seem like more of a catch in contrast, which deters those who are already in a relationship from looking into other romantic possibilities.

Second, love makes you envious. This "mate guarding" adaptation makes you watchful and defensive of anyone who might endanger your connection. Evolutionary psychologists contend that while excessive jealousy is a burden with terrible effects, it may also help guard against infidelity and attempts by others to steal your mate.

Finally, the mystical "meant to be" stories people tell about love may boost their confidence in the worth of their relationship, as our team is investigating in continuing research.

One of the things that might keep a relationship together for a long time is the power of love.

Why romantic magic beliefs can be helpful

Our research examines the adaptive potential of magical thinking, despite its fictional foundation. Emotions are frequently erratic and unpredictable, unlike a lease agreement. Believing in a story that says your relationship is mysteriously "meant to be" could provide you a consistent reason to be together for the long run rather than merely a sense of connectedness.

Even though a magical belief in fated love is almost definitely untrue, it might be justified as being "profoundly rational" if it strengthens a person's long-term commitment to a wonderful relationship. Love is a "unreasonable tie that becomes reasonable by virtue of its own existence," as neuroscientist Karl Deisseroth phrased it.

Therefore, it makes sense for love to seem magical even though magical love defies rationality. According to our interpretation of the findings, the enchantment of love aids individuals in making the massive commitment necessary to successfully carry on their genes.

But what are you to do with the knowledge that love's enchantment only exists to carry on your genes to future generations, fulfilling evolution's plainly utilitarian goal, rather than to bring happiness or even a true understanding of reality? The advise to "follow your heart," which so many competitors on "The Bachelor" gave while naively believing that you will find significance in pursuing a biological drive, can definitely be improved.

However, there is some truth to that cliche. One of life's greatest treasures could be lost if you overthink it and rebel against that magical thinking.

Authored by:

Benjamin Kaveladze, a psychological science PhD student at the University of California, Irvine

Jonathan Schooler, University of California, Santa Barbara's distinguished professor of psychological and brain sciences

Oliver Sng, a psychological science assistant professor at the University of California, Irvine